“Your grief path is yours alone, and no one else can walk it, and no one else can understand it.” – Terry Irwin
We all look for connection when we are grieving, for someone to “get” what we are going through. The hard truth is that each person who knew your Loved One, had a unique relationship with that person (that’s why I like this quote). You all grieve that unique companionship, personality, and give and take that happened with just them. Sure the being is the same person. Your Loved One showed up in other’s lives in all sorts of ways similar or not to how they showed up for you.
On the other hand, each type of connection is experienced in the same way. Marriages, lovers, siblings, parents, friends and even cousins… no two pair is exactly the same…
When I hear stories of life and loss, I am fascinated in that I have yet to hear two stories that are exactly the same. I am so thankful at the depth of differences.
Searching and looking for connection are a part of grief. I encourage you in your searching, to clarify what type of connection you seek.
Are looking for another of the same type of relationship like the loss of a spouse or parent or child?
Are you looking for connection in the type of cause of death like accident, illness, violence, or substance use?
Are you looking for someone in your type of lifestyle or shares your worldviews or lives in your community?
Your grief is your own, without comparison to another. It is beautiful to have your own experience. It’s healthy to search for support or understanding or connection at this time.
Be gentle with yourself, my friend.
Share if you are comfortable… what are you seeking at this time in you grief?